A few months ago I had a Marilyn Monroe inspired shoot with Brian Zombie.  I totally forgot I had this footage!  I love stumbling upon it and revisiting a cool moment in my life that I forgot about.  That's the Fun Cam for you :)

 

Yay, I'm back at my Jersey home!  This weekend I had two shows to go to PWS Bombshell's on Friday and the student show on Saturday.  Aside from my rasslin' weekend Kevin has some fun in the sun plans so stay tuned for iPhone Diaries.

 





 



It's always a fun time to have mi amigo Jerry with me for a daily video.  This was us on the way to the Bombshell's show.  Thursday night was a good one, we had a little slumber party at the PWS house so it was only fitting that Jerry be apart of my daily ;) Positive vibes!

YAY another #FonziFind!  Yesterday was quite the interesting day but it was a good one none the less and it all started with a #FonziFind.  Shortly after I edited this video Freddy Gallo and Brian Zombie picked me up for the Heroes of Wrestling show and I got to explain to Freddy exactly a #FonziFind is.  I am very passionate about he Fonz, perhaps I on my next #FonzyFind I will do an explanation on why I find them so intriguing.

Darn myself!  Well at least I have a good excuse for dropping the ball.  This is why I need Danielle with me, she always captures amazing moments.  Stay tuned for details on Frankie's female wrestler documentary.  In the mean time make sure to give her a follow on twitter.com/thaoracle for updates!

My Daily

#Day169 has started off in such a positive way.  Nothing in particular happened I just feel great!  Tonight I will face Mariah Moreno at Heroes of Wrestling in San Diego.  Danielle, Brian Zombie and Freddy Gallo are accompanying me to the event.  On the way there we are going to have a Zombie's Angels shoot so stay tuned for iPhone Diaries! 

Just a little friendly reminder, you can leave a comment to each blog, video and/or picture post.  I get an email whenever I get a post and answer them myself.  Twitter is fun an all but lets get interactive on my site where there is no 140 character limit.  Positive vibes, Love and Light to all!

Though I woke up late I feel so refreshed and more focused than ever.  Last night Danielle and I interview Taylen Delgado for this week's Café Danielle.  The energy Taylen and her mom brought to the interview still sits with my soul and I'm grateful for last night's experience.  That's what life is all about.  Taylen is the whole package and I wish nothing but positive vibes, Love and Light to her life.  As for today, I'm ready for whatever happens! 

My shoot got reschedule for Thursday but in  the meantime Danielle and I found our bronzy glow at Infinity Sun on Sunset Blvd in Hollywood!

Danielle and I have been spray tan models for Infinity Sun for quite some time now and every time we go we see this little café always say "one day after we tan we will go there."  Times have been tough but now the blessing are easily found.  I told Danielle "today is the day" and we had a wonderful brunch at Dialog Café.  The food was great!  Perhaps that will be our little routine, after we tan go to Dialog for a bite to eat.  While we were at the café Brian Zombie text me asking if we wanted to meet up and go to Downtown LA.  Danielle and I bussed it home just in time to check on the Mertzes, use the restroom and then jetted out in search of new wrestling boots for Friday.  Our first stop was Swanque Clothing aka the home of the Martinez Girlz look.  I found some super cute outfits for my wrestling weekend.  Danielle found the perfect outfit for Sunday's CWF Hollywood show.  Once we finished up at Swanque's the task at hand was to find my boots.  Long story short, after a long search I finally found a pair that I will debut at Heroes of Wrestling in San Diego Friday.  On the way to San Diego Danielle and I will have a in route photo shoot with Brian!  I'm so excite ;)

Last Wednesday I got called for a last minute shoot and boy was in an interesting experience.  I haven't done background for a long time but I wasn't doing anything that night and I could use the payday :)  Though this was a straight forward, simple shoot I gained so much from the experience that helped guide me into my wrestling weekend in Brownsville, TX.

#Day165

Hola!  I feel great and I cannot wait to see what the day has in store for me.  My soul has been rejuvenated!  I have come out of the cocoon and will fly into the world with a different mindset that's all positive vibes.  I trips me out how much my grandma's death has changed me and continues to change me.  The Lord used her to share His Love in a pure form.  I will take that with me every where I go in hopes to share His Love with as many people as possible.  This world is filled with hurt people who just need love.  There is not great love than God Love and I believe whole heartedly based on my own life experience.  That's why I wont shut up about it, I can't.  I'm commanded by God to love thy neighbor as thy self, it's what I'm supposed to do.  Sometimes it's not easy but in that discomfort I have found wisdom, peace, understand and therefore was able to let go and experience true Shalom. One that note time for some DDP Yoga BAM! Own it! ;)  Positive vibes everyone!

#Day163

I totally forgot to post this yesterday, better late than never right?  My flight to Texas was smooth and once I landed the fun in Brownsville became my companion.  Stay tuned to see my adventures.  Now  off to Paloma's house for a birthday BBQ.  The perfect way to end my day! 

#Day164

Well, I went back to the hotel only to realized I didn't take note of the room number so I had to go to the office and ask (like a shady gal) what my room number was.  As soon as I got to my room I slowly ate my food.  I thought I would go back to sleep but I got obsessed in fixing this little glitch on my site and before I knew it 8 AM rolled around.  I had done my online research before coming to this hotel and made the decision that on Saturday morning I would go lay out by the pool to catch a nice little tan.

Creekside Cardio

I always try to find ways to stay in shape while away from home and my routine.  One great way is taking long walks.  I'm a walker from way back and it not only helps me physically but always seems to help me spiritually/mentally.  Such a trip to walk to same path I did many moons ago yet here I am years later on quite the journey.

I Will Always Love My Grandma

It's still weird to me that my grandma passed away.  Being at her house this weekend was such a trip!  It's like my brain can't compute the fact she is gone and when I find myself lost in thought trying to make sense of it all I find wisdom tucked away.  A wisdom that is helping me become a better person.  That's my grandma thing, she brings out the best in people.  Praise God for His blessing when we need it the most.  Shalom.

#Day161/162

I totally spaced yesterday and forgot to do my daily entry so I figured I would do it when I got home.  Little did I know that coming home would be at 4:30 in the morning!  I booked a last minute gig yesterday so I stopped everything and left.  It was a long night, nothing fancy.  They needed a "hot date" so there I was to play one.  Though the gig itself was draining and I often wondered if I would ever do background again I found total inspiration on my way to the job.  For now it's #kayfabe  until then check out the video from this morning.

Part two of #Day162 was quite promising.  I went to 7-11 to get some coffee and much to my surprise I was greeting with the return of the Blueberry Crème coffee!  Today is free slurpy day but I can't afford the empty calories.  I have a show this weekend and I want to look my best.  The last few weeks have been difficult and I lost some tone-age and it's time to get it back. 

#Day160

Now that Danielle is back to her old hours looks like I'm back to my old routine!  It feels great, why did I stop?  Isn't it weird how sometimes we fall out of routine and its more difficult getting back into the groove of things?  Well I am hoping to not fall off my routine wagon again.  I feel more myself and taking care of business in a timely manner.  Tonight we are going to Danielle's work for a comedy night.  This is the first time they are doing something like this, should be fun!  Stay tuned for some iPhone Diaries ;)

The Beginning of an Interesting Weekend

Yesterday I went to Chino to help my mom prepare my grandma's house for a weekend estate sale.  Such a trippy time in my life.  As I have said over and over again I had dreams about this time in my life years ago.  No I'm not magic, no I have no powers I simply am aware of The Lord when He communicates with me.  As said in the video, my grandma had a dream about me cleaning out my old room and other family members cleaning her house.  Believe what you believe but I cannot help but share how my faith continues to become renewed and strengthen.  Who cares about wrestling, Hollywood, etc?  What's real is we are all soul in this world filled with darkness.  I am here to vouch you can be light in that darkness if light is what you seek.

Today was the official day of the estate sale.  There was a line of people waiting an hour before we open the doors.  My grandma would have been proud.  My mom has held estate sales for a few years and usually Danielle and I would help her but my grandma would be with her every step of the way.  She would help preparing the homes and going with my mom to run errands before the sale would begin.  I found myself feeling disconnected to the house and all my grandma's things.  I don't consider it a negative, in fact I think it's a positive.  After all, it's just stuff and my grandma is what brought this house to life.  As soon as she took her last breath she left this world and these are just the things left behind.  I thought I would feel more sentimental but I find sentiment in memories I had not in the material things.  Praise God for He is good and His Love will endure forever.

Day 157

I was super bummed I didn't get to hang out with my mom yesterday but it was fun having party #2 for Fred Mertzes birthday.  In a little while I will be on my way to the IE, I think this will be good for me.  I think it will help gain closure on my grandma's death.  I have been holding myself together well but I have to admit, sometimes I find myself overwhelmed by the fact I will never see my grandma again.  It's such a weird feeling.  Life is real, enjoy it.  ONE Love, peace be with you, God be with you.  Shalom.

#Day156

Happy birthday Fred Mertz/Fourth of July!  I just got back from dropping Danielle off and now it's time to get ready to head back to the 909.  My mom asked me to help clean my grandma's house out.  It's probably going to be intense but I know I have to do this for my grandma and mom.  I really wished Danielle could come with me but sometimes we have to go on our separate journeys in order to grow.  I'm down!  Last night we had a little Mertz party since I couldn't be here today.  Danielle will post a video from yesterday later today!  Until then have a safe and sane Fourth of July.

Dealing With the Passing of Our Grandma

 



It's been such an interesting time in my life.  June 17th my sweet grandma passed away and my life will never be the same.  Yes, I am going through the biggest heartbreak of my life but so much positive has come from this.  No matter what you believe in you cannot change the fact that one day we will all die.  It's intense but if you understand that fact you can find peace, at least I have.  My grandma passing has been my biggest fear since I was a little girl.  Many sleepless nights fearing that I would get a call in the middle of the night telling me she was gone.  I used to refer to it as my "grandma anxiety".  That time has come and I praise God for all that He has taught me.  Through my grandma's life, sickness and death The Lord used her to strengthen my soul which has brought me to who I am today.  The woman behind this screen typing these words, a woman I never thought I could be.  What a beautiful gift my grandma was and continues to be.  My mom asked Danielle and I to go casket shopping with her and stay until the funeral so we did.  It was so much fun having a slumber party with my sister in her old room.  Again, praise God for His blessings when we need it the most!  Check out the video above to hear what I am talking about ;) 

I had to go back to Hollywood for a day for an audition so Peter volunteered to pick me up before he went to work.  I decided to wait outside so that I could hang out with Ethel and just be one with nature.  I always thought that my grandma's death would tear me apart and I would sink into a deep depression.  I know The Lord has been preparing me for this over a year and I can't help but praise His name over and over for it.  I looked at life differently during my grandma's sickness but now that she has passed everything has become so clear.   Am I sad? OF COURSE!!!! Do I have peace? Yes, finally.

I don't know what's going on with my hair LOL Needless to say it's such a trip revisiting this footage.  My old roommate Lorena gave me a ride from LA to Chino but first we had to make a quick stop at her condo.  The Mertzes and I used to live here during my TNA run and I haven't been back there since and here I am, the day of my grandma's wake, at that condo again- with the Mertzes!  Little did I know in this video that about an hour later I would be at my grandma's coffin to drop off the flowers before the service.  We were the first ones to see her.  I disagree with open casket services but my family was insistent on it.  My feeling is that is not the person anymore.  As soon as they took their last breath their soul left this world to be in another.  People NEVER look the same in an open casket because their soul is no longer in their vessel.  I rather remember people when they had life in them, not a lifeless body.  When Lorena and I first got to the funeral home we saw through a window grandma and we both were nervous because we knew we had to go in there and the casket was open.  We had to pull the car up to get the flowers and while we did that the funeral home director closed the casket which Lorena and I were VERY grateful for.  It was still difficult to go through but as per usual the Mertzes were of great comfort.  Lorena held Ethel, I held Fred and they made us feel at ease.